PART 1
It was about a decade ago that I cracked a tooth.
I was having a good night out drinking: gabbling with my mouth full, chomping my way through a bag of fruit and nuts that had torn open in my pocket.
A “cracking” good night out drinking?
Anyway, some time previously, I’d picked up what looked like a diamond-encrusted nut (as in “nuts and bolts” rather than a disco peanut), and had forgotten that that was at large in the same pocket.
What happens when an irresistible force meets an immovable object is classically known as an impossible situation. But in this half-baked approximation, what actually happened was a large chunk of one of my lower left molars sheared right off….
“Bye bye, Terrence – I’m off to see the world!”
The fragment actually went straight in the bin.
Over the next half dozen or so years, the amalgam fillings used to rebuild the tooth fell out several times, and were replaced on the NHS without fuss.
Until about 2 years ago, when the latest one fell out as well.
The tooth was drilled, and another new filling was placed.
About a week later, after that one had fallen out too (!) I was back at the dentist being told that the pulp/nerve was now exposed, and that it would need root canal treatment – which wasn’t available on the NHS there. Only extraction was….
There was a brief hiccup in the booking process, when they dropped in an “if you think you need it….
I mean, do I not need it? You’re the dentist here! I’m just going on trust.
I didn’t say that, but a few days later I found out that they just meant to highlight that there was an alternative: having my tooth ripped out (with blood and guts all over the floor, probably. No thank you!).
So, my first private dentist completed the root canal a week or 2 later, no unforeseen problems – apart from then adding that I would also need a crown, where I’d been given a temporary filling.
I tried to book that with the receptionist, but was told that it would need to be arranged through the surgery that had referred me. Which, by this time, I wasn’t too keen on – I was starting to think that they’d botched the filling (drilled right through my tooth), and getting hold of anyone at the practice was a total nightmare.
So I went back to the list of NHS dentists in my area, and got on the phone again.
I failed (this is the southeast). So, with time not on my side, I decided it was time to find another private dentist….
The crown was completed shortly after Christmas, and I was relieved it was all over.
It was not, in fact, all over.
Fast forward about 6 months, and…. Before we jump to Dentist 6, maybe it would be helpful to have a list of the characters:
Dramatis Personae:
- Yours truly: Me.
- Guest starring Fragment 1: Currently holidaying in landfill. Relative of Terrence.
- Terrence: Tooth root + remnant structure. AKA Lower left 7 (AKA Lower left 6 by Dentist 4). Lives in my mouth.
- Dentist 1: NHS dentist who referred me for root canal treatment after, ahem, discovering that the pulp was exposed following a filling.
- Dentist 2: Private dentist who did the root canal treatment.
- Dentist 3: NHS dentist who turned out to work for the same group of dental practices as Dentist 1. Declined to get involved in treatment of tooth lower left 7.
- Dentist 4: Private dentist who did the crown.
- Dentist 5: NHS dentist who said a recently filled wisdom tooth needed to be removed by an NHS specialist (but didn’t book the appointment when agreed, and was a train and a bus ride away).
- Dentist 6: Private dentist, approached re wisdom tooth extraction.
- Dentist 7: NHS dentist who removed a wisdom tooth with minimal fuss. Unlikely to feature much here.
- Dentist 8: My current NHS dentist.
- Fragment 2: Suspected relative of Terrence and Fragment 1.
- Dentist 9: Currently an imaginary dentist.
- Dentist 10: Imaginary fantasy horror dentist….
So, Dentist 6 agreed that the wisdom tooth would need to be removed….
But also added that the crown was not properly positioned – meaning food could get stuck and decay set in, which could mean extraction was all that was left….
It would need to be replaced. Took 3 months to send me a treatment estimate….
I returned to Dentist 4 (the one who did the crown). Their verdict was that it wasn’t a problem, and I should just floss more….
Next time: the crown sawn in half and then stuck back together – live and in full 9K Ultra HD (together with a proper introduction of Fragment 2 and the Frankentooth). Or maybe: the dentist who went a bit nuts with the polisher (and that larger story). You decide.
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Stay subscribed for more cliffhangers, and to find out how many dentists I can burn through in the next 6 months!